When faced with bullying, whether at school, at work, at home, on the internet or even among friends, it can be a difficult situation. Although everyone reacts differently, we all feel the pain and struggle that bullying brings.
This is for those who have experienced or are experiencing bullying: You will get through it, it will pass and you will come out stronger than before.
Story time
I say this because I faced bullying in my later years in secondary school (kids can be cruel but sometimes adults are not far behind). Coming to the UK and going straight to secondary school was hard in and of itself because the school here was so different from the school in Uganda where I come from.
In my home country, I was in a boarding school; you could not move to the next year if you had not passed the year, you were in. Plus, you would not dare to resist and be rude to a teacher because in school the teacher was your authority. In other words, they could discipline you.
So you can imagine that it was all new, and on top of that, I did not speak the best English. The children always asked me where I was from, and at that time, in the early 2000s, it was not popular coming from Africa (if you know, you know).
When it all came to a head
Anyway, it was not until year 10 that things got so serious for me that I started making excuses not to go to school.
A group of girls would gang up on me after class and sometimes push me against the wall or prevent me from going in a certain direction, so I had to take a different path.
I had a friend from Angola who was also bullied and taunted, but the difference with her was that although she did not speak English, she stood up for herself and fought back when she needed to. They soon left her alone.
But for me it took a while; I am quite a slow burner. It all came to a head for me when I was walking down a corridor and three girls bigger than me started pushing me and asking what I was going to do about it.
When I stood up, it was as if I had turned into the hulk who had drawn strength from who knows where, and I started fighting with the three girls. At this point, I did not care that I was outnumbered. I’d had enough and they were going to feel my wrath.
As much as they tried to beat me up and humiliate me, as a crowd had gathered; it did not work. In the end, they looked like fools and got suspended from school.
A little encouragement
Always remember this:
1. The bullying is not about you – In most cases, the bullying has nothing to do with you, but rather with the insecurities or problems of the bully that are projected onto you externally.
2. You can stand up to them – You have the power within you to fight back against the bully.
3. Talk to someone about it – Because in many cases you are not alone.
And with that, I’ll leave you with this:
Unknown
“Bullying is not a reflection of your character, but rather a sign of the bully’s lack of character.”
